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Meme: Boris The movie

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Boris The movie

Do you know how much the Network spends for the drama per year? 300 million! And for the cinema? 40! Do you know what does this mean? That I, in here, to survive, I have to fight like a crazy. - And so you come from this beatiful country where if one wanted, I say to say, to find some drugs of good quality would not have problems. | - Well, you can remedy something in Grottaferrata, but in my opinion, are more provided in Naples, or in Sicily. - This hall... | - Eh. | - From which the lady of the halls comes out... | - Uhm? | - Uhm? How do you want it illuminated: open or closed? | - Here, good. I never want to hear these adjectives again, never again! Clear? There will be a middle ground and holy shit, Duccio! - Say to Sergio to make the bank transfer. When we get the TRN from the bank we star writing. | - Ok, but start immediately, no? Look that we have little time, eh. | - We expect the TRN: Transaction reference number.
Yes, I like it very much, very much we too. Yes, yes, let's make a Christmas comedy too. Ah! But enough, enough with these serious, moralistic movies. A beatiful funny comedy, carefree. The Caste. But a wonderful project. Here we have to start immediately to have a bit of dinners. - I think it needs. I think it's necessary. | - Ok, it's the same, come on. | - It's not the same. It needs or it's necessary? At one point the bullet approaches a millimeter from the face and he really, I have studied it, just the exact words, the bullet arrives and he says: Fu-cking lu-cky!
But do you want to understand that who is against me is against himself? Because the man, has not realized that when he gave up that set has left all of us in the shit, but in the real shit! - There will be news. It will be... it will be the Strait of Messina Bridge. | - A bridge... will solve all our problems? The Caste. What is it, brilliant comedy? Do we do it sparkling?
Perfect guys. We have managed with The caste of Ferretti. But now, please, let's focus on the debut movie of Pupo. - I don't see you calm. Do you need of... tell the truth, of 100 Euros? | - No! | - Tell mom if you have need. Do you remember how grandma used to say? Come on, come on, come on. | - Come on, come on, come on. However from a bad thing, well, a beautiful thing can also be born, right? - And so you're forced to do the peppered mussels. A movie, that is, metaphorical plausible, to pass off as universal story. Ahahaha. | - Ok, come on. | - We, if you want the peppered mussels in 3 weeks we write it to you.
You have to do what we tell to you. You have to shoot the scenes as we tell to you. Understood? Otherwise you're out and we take another director. Because after the cinema section, there's the radio. After the radio, there's the death! Excuse me, excuse me, do you have a light? I know that as President of the Chamber I should set a good example, of course. Sorry René, I was not listening to you. Is that... the character has left!
- But is it true? | - It's by Piovani, for Life is Beautiful. My best friend is died. And with Francesco it leaves, it leaves a part of me maybe, maybe the most beatiful. I wanted to tell you only this little anecdote: a few days ago, Francesco has entered my dressing room, it was as if he had, a strange presentiment. He told me, he told me: Stanis, if anything should happen to me, I want you to do my role, because you're the greatest actor that I've ever met. This has told me. I'll take care of it, Francesco. I'll take care of it. I would have made a movie about the 70s. What was the relationship between Red Brigades and Mossad, what was the relationship between Red Brigades and Magliana Gang, there really was a technostructure that steered everything. René! I can not believe it's all over.
- A project has started. A very nice thing. Pickle. You're perfect, yes. You're the only who can hold the pressurre betwenn the Calabria region, the Network, the 'ndrangheta, the recommendation and bring home the episodes. | - What is, a soap? | - It's a soap, René, it's a soap but you don't have to piss me off because you have no choice. I can not believe it. It works. - The President of the Chamber, Gianfranco Fini, I play it. | - But there's no Fini in my movie, Stanis. | - It's a mistake. It's a mistake. Do you wnat to make a movie about Italy without Gianfranco Fini, Renato? - But, have you made Gomorra? | - No, Gomorra... was produced by Fandango. I... I have taken the picture.
- No, I wanted to thank for the clarity, I have immediately understood what you wanted to say. So I have 4 shit faces, let's say classic, evergreen, and then I have a promising young thirty years old, Tatti Barletta, I don't know if you know him. It's a real shit face. Eh, he's got fat and he's perfect. I send you the picture. | - I'll talk to you later, thanks. He has just said thanks for the clarity. - Why did you call me the damned bitch? I have heart the daughter of Mazing saying on the radio transmitter that you called me the damned bitch. | - You're hurting yourself, do you know it? I have done everything to have you in this movie. Everything. - Listen friend, sorry if I only give you an hour... | - But come on! | - But I've a show in Geneva, tonight. Among other things, I have added a stuff about human rights, reckless, very strong. | - Who cares! Gentlemen, a moment of attention, everyone. Renato's speech could not be missing.
- In Italy, the level of the acting is considered inferior, compared to your Spanish, French colleagues. How do you explain, this difference? | - Yes. I have made a small mistake of judgment, because I, in 3 years in agreement with my agent, had to become the new Ferilli and instead I missed the target, because I had to focus on France. Because you buy a nice little house in Paris, you learn a little French, good morning, good evening and you have solved! That then, don't write this however eh, the idea to aim for Sarkozy, but whose was it? It was mine, no? Only that that one has informed, because she informs, and she dashed on him! Said this, now I think of something else. I go ahed. I think... to Putin! - May I ask you something? | - Uh. | - But my character, is she a mathematician? | - It's hers childhood dream! - René... René... this is the number 5 of Medusa, almost the 4. | - Nice to meet you, René Ferretti. | - But René what the fuck are you doing? Ahahah! What are you doing, you greet a monkey, I'm joking. Never ever debase the role of Parliament. Every citizen has some rights but also some duties. Frankly.
- Your friend has ingested an entire pack of antidepressants. We have proceeded with an injection of Narcan, we have checked the pressure, he's better, he's much better. | - Yes? Can we rest assured? | - Everything under control, don't worry. Ah, alternately invokes the name of René and the one of Gianfranco Fini. It's a minefield, René. No names. No name of politician. No name of party. I, would set everything in Brazil. Why, in your opinion, there's no a caste even there? In your opinion, everything is going smoothly in Brazil? - Listen René, I prefer to tell the people I work with, even for fairness, in short. I, in the evening, take. | - The... that is you take... | - I take drugs. I make use of heroin to say it bureaucratically, but only in the evening. Never during work. No, I tell you because maybe in the evening you call me and it's easy that I don't answer to you, in short. | - No, but don't worry! Listen, I also often don't answer the phone in the evening. They have said I'm a jackal, have you understood? They say that no actor would replace a dead colleague on the day of the funeral, that is a fact of sensitivity. But I don't have the money for all this sensitivity, René, eh!
But the shame is a luxury that you can not afford, Giuseppe. Your voters a fuck! "The Caste, the scandal book of 2 journalists that show hot the Italian politicians are a caste that over time has attributed to itself all sort of scandalous privilege. An untouchable elite, a legalized fraud, worth 3 billion euros a year." This country doesn't have a competition. The competition is us, is always us. The thing that we have to do is very simple: all the characters that we first saw with a critical eye because of their wrongdoings become positive. Thieves, bribe-takers, corrupts, are positive, eh.
- I have heard about this thing on which you have the rights. The caste. In your opinion, no, can be done a comedy? | - Of The caste? | - Yes. | - I don't know. I can ask. I don't really think so. | - Ok, eh... ok if we make it as a product of social commitment. That these like it. - Massimo.. but, you... didn't make the serious theater! | - I've been directed by Ronconi... | - Eh. | - I've been directed by Sorrentino... | - Eh! | - And now I struck it rich. René, the great working-class narrative. It's the future. I have to shit! I want to work here, in my restaurant. The food service is the only serious thing in Italy. - René Ferretti, Letizia Casta. Show the documents. | - No no no, I trust. | - Hers name is Letizia and not Laetitia but it's the same thing. | - I was about to fall asleep!
I knew that sooner or later I won the Oscar. - Do you want the rod? | - Which rod? | - The gun. | - But are you crazy, Sergio? I can not how to use the gun, I don't want it. But how the rod? Also during the press conference, a journalist of the newspaper Repubblica, asks to me: "Listen Martellone... but don't you think that your success is a bit the sign of the times?" I looked at him and I answered him: "Who gives a shit!" Ehehehh! Also for, no? Nothing, I think that he has felt regret and then has torn me to shreds. The only thing that matters is your will. Do you want to make a minimal caste? Let's make a minimal caste. Do you want it at 200 km per hour? And we make a caste at 200 km per hour e nobody must have anything to say. Do you want it dark? Do you want a thriller... a thriller, a bit with an Hamletic taste. Let's make something for sonnies. A nice bollocking for sonnies. All minicars, the races with the minicar. In short, René, you change your mind, I change your mind with you.
- It's nice. But from who have you copied? | - You lack respect to us, René. Maybe you don't deserve it. Keep the control this shit! Hey asshole! Hey shithead! You can go to fuck yourself right now! Have you understood? Hey false! No, because this show, Fucking lucky, has ruined my life. Oh, but thanks to it I have also bought a house, eh. Fucking lucky! And if I do another bullshit they downgrade me. They send me to the cinema section, where there are the directors who don't wash themselves, that smell of sulfur.
You know, behind this my self-confidence even I hide an absolutely insecure nature. - Will it talk enough about reality? If it's not real enough, they notice it. Re-read Čechov. The fade music of life. | - Yes, but this is a movie a bit more current. | - Nothing is more current than Čechov. - What are you laughing at? | - Come on nothing, it's a bullshit, come on. | - Come on say it to me. | - It's inappropriate. | - Ok whatever, at this point say it to me, no. | - There is no more signal. - René, I don't like this Caste at all. I like The eyes of the heart, there everything is more romantic, understood? | - I had no doubt. Gentlemen, extraordinary news: it doesn't like Itala! It doesn't like Itala!
- No, I don't write anymore. I read. Novels, architecture books. For another 10 years I will read, then I'll decide what to do. | - Eh... | - Why did we meet? | - Eh! Our home is television. It's like the mafia. There's no way out, if not from dead. - Are you Biascica? Do you think am I a slut? | - No. I'm not Biascica. But yes, I think you're a slut. - Listen. More onion? | - Yes, more onion.
- What is the first thing to make a Christmas comedy? Answer... you! | - Well, look for an exotic destination... | - First thing is a coffee. And so we have thought, let's do a nice project as Gomorrah. A great book, a great director and a movie that you undestand and you don't understand. I didn't understood a shit. What wine. How many beautiful people! And what wine. - Because he's an artist... and the artist by definition does what he wants, right? | - Yes. | - What the fuck he wants the artist does.
- Rene, all of them are dead. Except one. | - That one buryes us all. | - Boris. The scene is already a shit of itself and if we shoot it in slow motion it becomes inadmissible. - René, we have a big thing in our hands. | - A robbery? | - But not, a thing for the cinema. Oh, René, but for me you can also direct Bombolo! I needed a horse. You're my horse. Renato, gallops!
- Do you remember that check of The eyes of the heart 3? | - Ah, ah, sure, here the check, right. I was saying right now to Corinna that I have a bit of liquidity problems... | - Corinna? Corinna Negri? [The damned bitch! Say hallo to her for me, a lot.] | - Eh... but what do you say? What bitch. It doesn't seem to me that someone called her so. | - No no, sure, I remember it very well. René called her the damned bitch and Biascica the slut. René would make a Christmas comedy, Holy God, we have said it. He would like to make Christmas with the caste. GENIUS! Modest genius! - Excuse me. Sorry. Oh well, but you're an idiot! | - Why, what have I done? | - That is, we're officially looking for an actor for the role face of shit, do you realize? Baranes! Hi, I'm Patanè. Listen, I wanted to ask you, the photography, in the scene of the party, how were you doing it? That is, it's not that by chance you have a light scheme... hello? Hello! This unkind!
- Do you know what I was thinking? If at one point if burst the head at one of these of The Caste. | - That is... you say that... like Andreotti, who always has a headache. | - No, as if it exploded the brain, understood? Bam! - So René, how do you see, this public prosecutor? | - Karin, what I can tell you. You're like... utopia. - René, are you sure of the slow motion? Do you want to shoot another one at normal speed so then, you can decide during the editing? | - No, that's ok. Let's shoot the next one. I can not do anything but mention Ol' Dirty Bastard: "Shimmy shimmy ya, shimmy yam, shimmy yay". And I have said everything. Bye Francesco..
- Yes but... I have not understood why even Corinna Negri. That is, but how shit we do come on. She's the damned bitch. | - But it's the same agency, René. Do you want Francesco Campo? And you get also... the damned bitch. | - They're packages... they do it, they do it. You're risking, you're risking, René. Go! Go to shoot this extraordinary material, move! - See the objects. Everything lives in its own light. Paraphrasing that book, which I have not read, one could say that everything here is illuminated. | - Well, I'm glad. And so? | - And so I would not do anything. | - How I would do nothing? | - No, that is, I would keep the interior lights, no, diegetic, political. Political poetic cinema. - A tir. | - What? I haven't understood. | - A tir. Tir.
- Do you want to sign? | - I don't sign anything. | - It's a petition that I have found on Internet to move the Vatican abroad so even the other countries can benefit from all that advantages we have had for centuries, having them here, by us, in Italy. | - That is, you're telling me, the Vatican... | - Away. | - Away! - Yes ok, but you have done a great refusal and you have opened a restaurant. | - Yes I have understood, but I wasn't looking for shortcuts by allowing myself. | - Okay, I was inspired by you. - One, two, three, four, five. | - Not for me, thanks. | - Not for me either. | - No, don't worry. It's for me. I make a blow for each of presents. We wanted to bring a wheel of Parmigiano Reggiano cheese but then we have thought that it would have been rude.
But we have to think the tits as the utopia of Galeano. What did the great Edoardo Galeano say? He said that utopia is like the horizon: you take 2 steps forward, that moves two steps away. You take 3 steps and that goes three steps away. So he says: what utopia is useful for? It helps to walk. And so, what tits are uself for in our movie? To sell the tickets, to cash, to make money. - Listen René. If a gentleman came, with a black small suitcase and told you that Corinna Negri is in your movie. | - I would shoot him. | - And if in that small suitcase there was even a week longer of shootings? | - I would shoot this gentleman anyway. | - And besides that week more of shootings in that black small suitcase there's even... Francesco Campo. | - Really? | - But truly? | - You have heard right, Francesco Campo is with us, he will play in the movie, I agreed with the agency. So gentlemen, there will not be any speech this time because they have already made me wast too much time. I will only say 3 words: I want Boris here!

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